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How NOT TO Lose Weight

Haaa... today I will write about losing weight. Or better still, how NOT TO LOSE WEIGHT!


5-ways :)

But please bare with me, that some of the things here might be the stuff that many people have actually done, to lose weight...

  1. GO ON A DIET!!! -- Okes. The word diet is so synonymous with weight loss. I mean they have all sorts of diets. ATKINS diet, 'something' BEACH diet, HOLLYWOOD diet, and so on and so forth. But the word 'diet', is actually something that is definitely... TEMPORARY! I mean haiyoo gazambo... you go on a diet with the intention of stopping it one day right? And of course, this leads to the 'greatest' diets of all... the YOYO diet :) You go on a diet... get off it... (then get fat again)... then RE-diet again... get off again... (get fat again)... diet again... and so on and so forth :) You see the yoyo?
  2. GO TO THE GYM!!! -- Ok. Exercising is good... I am all for exercise! And where else to exercise than in a nice modern gym. But wait... you really think gyms are gonna solve your weight problems? I read a book (I think the title is Get Off Your Ass), and the author was a gym owner. Guess what? He received a ray of light, and closed down his gym! It wasn't because he had no customers... but it was because he got fed up seeing people joining his gym, and ending up quitting after (an average of) 90++ days! This is what happens actually. Well, not to everyone lah, but to most of the not-knowers :) Not-knowers here meaning those who think GYMS will solve their fat-belly or belly-fat problems.
  3. BUY THE LATEST FAT BURNING CREAMS and AS-SEEN-ON-TV EXCERCISE GADGETS -- Ok... I will have to admit. I too succumbed to one of these contraptions. After seeing the second ab-machine on TV, I bought it!!! But Alhamdulillaah, managed to return it after it did not perform as hoped for. Anyway, among the earlier gadgets to hit Malaysia's Smart Shop was Tony Little's Ab Isolator. I did not know then... but I almost bought this one. Since I am not good at describing it with words... I will just show it to you :P
  4. Ok. I don't think this is Tony Litte's one, but it looked very-very similar :) As you can see, it even looks weird. The problem with 'machines' like this is not in the machine itself. True, it can HELP flatten your abs... and true-er still, it can make your stomach a whole lot harder! But what the as-seen-on-TV ads don't tell us is about the word HELP itself. These things will HELP you lose weight... but if used alone, it will become just another collector's item for McGuyver to modify in the future :) Used alone, this machine will not make you lose weight. If used constantly however, your tummy will become harder and stronger. But you won't lose any significant weight. BTW, you guys must know those rocker type ab machines right? Me and my friends bought one back in 97-98... I think now it's serving its true purpose of a very2 nicely designed towel hanger :)

  5. DRINK FAT BURNERS or JAMU-JAMU or SLIMMING TEA -- "Drink this, and you'll lose 10-kilos in 10-days!!!". Ok, please do not do this, because some of the stuff out there, you don't even know what's in them! This is the short-cut way... and while some do make you lose weight, it ain't the weight that you want to lose. As a matter of fact, most of the weight will be water... and you gain that back once not consuming the product anymore, or after you drink back liquid from drinks or even... just plain water :P

  6. DO 500 to 1000 SITUPS or AB CRUNCHES A DAY -- Ok. I know many people who think that doing tummy exercises will flatten your tummy. NO THEY WON'T!!! They will make your abdominal muscles harder and stronger though (same as the Ab-Isolator). But you won't be losing any weight with that. Well, maybe a pound or a pund and half... but nothing to be proud about. :)

Actually there are more than just five. Tapi takut Mat Nabil marah saya tulis panjang2. Kekeke. Don't mad Mat Nabil, just gurau2 senda di pagi hari :D

So, how do we actually lose weight? Semua ni rasa2 macam pernah buat... ataupun macam pernah cuba nak buat... And HA! I did actually lose weight! Apa si Alpyan ni merepek? Haaa... So how? Hmmmm..... Ok ok. If you guys have such questions... I will try to answer, even tho I am not fitness expert :P Anywayz... that will be another entry, insya-Allaah :) Tu pon kalau korang nak baca :P Ni tengha takde idea nak blog apa la ni, tu pasal tulis pasal benda ni (lagi :P)

Okes... adios amigos!!! (and amigos-nita?)

Assalaam aleykom WBT dan Salaam Muhibbah.

(This entry is more of a reminder to the blogger himself... for not exercising for soo long now oredi... and oso not eating the right foods... resulting in great fat accumulation in unwanted areas :P Don't mad aaaa...)

14 comments:

MRM said...

Kan best kalau jadi mcm casper tu, makan aje apa2, semua lalu macam masuk tiub and keluar balik :D

Nabil said...

bole jadik macam casper tu..tapi err..u wouldn't wanna go there :P

alpyan ape aku yg disalahkan...di manakah keadilan...haa weekend ko balik rumah, berat badan tu mesti meningkat :D

dLyn aZmi said...

aku ade satu lagi cara nak kurus..
wat PhD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ketensenanan akan memakan segala lemak di madan dan muka tanpa dipinta wakakakaka

Ahmad Javanese said...

MRM: Casper? Tidaaak... I dun wan to die yet... :P

MatNabil: Kekekek. Saje je nak carik scapegoat... so aku bubuh la nama kau :P

Dlyn: Hua hua hua! I agree. Kalau tensen nanti buleh kurus :P TAPI! Dia bukan bakar lemak tau... since kita tak eksesais (most probably la), and makan pon tak jaga sangat (which is the case most of the time)... maka benda yg akan dibakar dulu ialah... otot :( Dan salah satu otot yg turut dibakar dulu ialah... jantong. ish ish ish. not good for a smoker like me... kena renti isap rokok ni :P

MRM said...

Dlyn: Tengok nasib kot sbb ada orang bila tension buat PhD, dia lagi jadi kuat makan, waarghhh! :(

Aisey, aku baru aje rs mcm nak ponteng kelas body step ptg ni, tapi bila baca entry ko ni trus rasa cam serba salah lak..erk...

Nabil said...

MRM ni byk tul kelas dia pegi...hebat2...abis phd mesti badan dia tough macam jennifer garner. :D

Ahmad Javanese said...

MRM: bagus aa ko ni mas :) join kelas2 senaman, kuat jenjalan... pada masa sama PHD jalan :D bagush bagush :) bakal jadik lect serba-serbi :)

Mat Nabil: Jenni Garner? Bukan Jessica Beil lagik tough ke. especially dalam citer Stealth tu... gilos!!!!

Azwad said...

The most important thing is WHAT YOU EAT.

Forget soft drinks, fast food and fries. Limit your fat, salt and oils intakes. Avoid sugar. Low carb is quite ok e.g. less rice. Then, 90% work is done. Now, do some exercises.

DISCLAIMER: I'M NOT AN EXPERT AND I DON'T HAVE A 6 PACKS ABS (YET).

Ahmad Javanese said...

Azawd: 3/4 true oredi. but u cant limit carb too much for the body might go into a ketonic or ketogenic state (kot? if thats the correct term :P) Balance is key... provided masak pon cara elok la

anywayz... thats the way to go :D

dLyn aZmi said...

mas,
betul.. depends on org.. me? makin tensen xde mkn trus gi tido hahaha winter ni yup mkn byk sket tp sbb berjalan kaki ke sana ke mari esp ke lab dengan mengusung notebook yang boleh dikategorikan berat.. maka kadar lemak yg terbakar lebih byk hehehe

alpyan kunta kinte...
kagum tengok hang kurus slps blk dr ozi dulu :D
aku pun bkl mengalami nsb yg sama.. rase dah semakin mencengkung nih...

ahj-sd2 said...

semua mau kurus ehh..
mari kita sama sama tunggu,sape yang buat phd tapi badan makin naik..itulah orang yang bakal jadik dekan FSKTM kita semua.. hua hua hua.. buat phd tapi hati manyak senang.. :p

Azwad said...

Catabolic state right?

It's true. When there's a rise of glycogen due to physical activities, it will deplete the muscles tissue instead.

You lose weight because you lose muscles as well and you will look malnourished.

Ahmad Javanese said...

tak sure... rasa2 bukan catabolic. But yes, that is what catabolic means :) Preferably kita nak anabolic la ye dok :P Cuma jgn guna steroids je.

Yang aku faham is that... bila kita go on extreme low or NO carb diet... Macam ATKINS contohnye... then body akan guna lemak sebagai bahan bakar or something (which sounds good cuz bakar lemak, but is actually very2 pelik :P)... instead of the low or non exisitng carb. End up nanti akan berlaku something called KETOSIS? ... salah satu side efek yg aku pernah dengar... nanti bila ada nye ketones (a gas kot?), nafas buleh bau macam epal busuk? uwekkkk :(

Azwad said...

my mistake, catabolic state involves the depletion of glycogen, not an increase

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